coffee & cream

What is the Coffee and Cream? It is a coffee and ice cream shop we hope to open in South Milford. Why would two people who don’t drink coffee want to open a coffee shop? That is a really good question. Since moving to the South Milford area we have been praying about finding/creating a third space for people to gather (see blog on third spaces).

In July of 2021 we were having breakfast with another couple that has the same heart as ours, for Jesus and our community. They had been praying with us for the same thing. The old brick building in South Milford had especially been on Andrea’s heart, so our friends said let’s call the owner and see what the deal is with that building. The owner is an HVAC company called J.O. Mory and the president said, why don’t you come look at it now. And so that is what we did.

This building (really 2 brick buildings connected) was built in 1893 and had been many things over the years from a bank to a grocery and clothing stores to having offices for J.O. Mory at one time. But it has been many many years since it had been really used except storing a few things. While general maintenance had been done over the years here and there, lots of work would have to be done to get it to a usable place to have a coffee shop there.

I shared our dream and vision of a coffee shop to the president as he showed us around the building, with its historic stamped tin ceilings and areas where beautiful big windows once were that had been boarded up for many years. We could all envision to one degree or another what this could be, but we also saw all the man hours and financial investment it would take.

As the president went back across the road to his office, I was thinking there is no way this could happen outside of a miracle of God. We estimated $20,000 to $30,000 to just get it to a place to start thinking about a coffee shop. Our friends said we could maybe fundraise or get grants to cover this cost. But again, that would be just enough to get the building into a usable place not all the expenses of converting it to a coffee shop. I will be honest, I was overwhelmed by the thought, and I think I said out loud, that if God wants this to happen, He will have to make it happen.

My thought was let’s pray some more and get together with are friends in a few weeks and see how we felt God was leading. God was ready to move a little faster than Andrea and I were. Two days after our tour of the brick building, Andrea and I drove by and noticed water being pumped out of the basement, two days after that we drove by again and saw doors open and could tell work was being done inside. I called my friend and said “Hey, do you know what’s going on at the building?” He had noticed the same and had contacted the president. When we had shared our vision with him, he got so excited he decided to start the extensive repairs almost immediately. Just some of the work they are doing is replacing floor joist and floors, foundational and brick work on the outside, water, and sewage (that’s how long it has been since this building has been used, it currently doesn’t have either), heating and cooling, and much more.

I was blown away by how quickly God was moving. While those repairs would take many months, we knew we needed to start moving. We contacted some family friends who started a coffee shop in March of 2020 (and survived) and met with them. They were and continue to be such a blessing. Andrea started taking a “Coffee Shop Startup” class online that came highly recommended. We began building a team around us, that love Jesus, and have more business and coffee experience than us. Things keep moving forward and miracles keep happening. We are excited what God has in store and will keep you updated as things progress.

What Are Third Spaces?

When we felt the Lord calling us to plant a church again in 2018, we intentionally took a year to prepare to plant well. In this year we decided that we wouldn’t take any concrete steps to plant a church unless we clearly felt the Lord asking us to take such steps. That year was a year of studying the discipleship principles of Jesus as well as the current culture that we are living in today. What we discovered of our current culture is that it is a post-Christian culture (explanation of that will come in another blog) and that 70% of unchurched Millennials and Gen Zer’s (basically anyone born after 1980) won’t go to church even if invited. Reasons for that is varied, negative perception of church, bad experience in church, no interest in church, etc.

If this is the case for the younger generations, and our personal experiences back that up, and since we want to reach younger people with the Good News of Jesus Christ, then it most likely will not happen at a church service or Christian event, because many will not go even if invited. So, we must think more like missionaries and reach them where they live, work, and play. Those 3 places (live, work, and play) are like the three places sociologist Ray Oldenburg describes in his book The Great Good Place. First place is where we live, second place is where we work, and third place is where we hangout outside of the first two places.

If the Church is going to reach the younger generations, we will have to reach people in these three places, but for this blog post I want to focus on the third place. The subtitle of Oldenburg’s book The Great Good Place, is Cafes, Coffee Shops, Community Centers, Beauty Parlors, General Stores, Bars, Hangouts, and How They Get You Through the Day. Those are examples of third places. A third place is a public setting that hosts regular, voluntary, and informal gatherings of people. It is a place to relax, a place people enjoy visiting. Third places provide the opportunity to know and be known.

Oldenburg list 8 characteristics of third places:

1. It’s a neutral ground, everyone is welcome, no requirements or invitations needed.
2. It acts as a leveler, people from all walks of life gather and there are no social or economic barriers.
3. Conversation is the main activity; talk is free to happen and often does on many different levels. 
4. It is accessible and accommodating. At their best third places are place to which one may go at almost any time of the day or evening with assurance that acquaintances will be there. They tend to be conveniently located.
5. There are regulars. There are people who go there on a regular basis.
6. They are often low profile. As a physical structure they are typically plain and unimpressive looking, often in older buildings as cost or rent is typically lower.
7. The mood is often playful. A third place is often a place with food, drinks, and games, where conversations abound, the mood is typically light and joyful, and anxiety can be released. This is often why people come back.
8. It’s a home away from home for some. It’s a place that people feel at home when they are there.

Obviously not all third places have all 8 of these characteristics, but you have probably seen a coffee shop, bar, hair salon, youth center, even a gas station and many other places as third places. A healthy community needs good third places for the community to gather, build relationships, and connect to one another.

For those of us who follow Jesus, it is a natural place for us to hangout and develop new relationships with the 70% who may never enter a church service or event. But through conversation and trust building may be open to the Gospel because of the story of your life intersecting with Jesus’ that they have heard, they may want to know more about this relationship with Jesus. This is why two people who currently don’t drink coffee are starting a coffee shop.